Several years ago I received from the Holy Spirit the conviction that He had given me the gift of miracles and healing. I then began to exercise it. But later in the ministry, I experienced two or three unfortunate experiences. It had traumatized me and affected my strength in praying for the sick. I told myself that I had to be satisfied with being a good teacher and a good preacher. This way of seeing things was not God’s will. How can this be rectified?
« Examine me, O LORD, and prove me; try my loins and my heart », says the Bible in Psalms 26:2. To try the reins is to try the inner engine. Indeed, the Bible links strength to the loins. « Lo now, his strength is in his loins, and his force is in the navel of his belly », says Job 40:16. The spiritual loins are the source of a person’s strength, it is the inner vigour. Spiritual loins are affected when there are things you want to do but you no longer find the strength to do them. Life’s failures, unfortunate experiences, emotional wounds; in short, life’s hard blows affect the spiritual loins of many Christians.
The betrayal you suffered may have taken away your strength to trust again or even forgive. You were strongly hurt by an attitude or a word of your spouse and you no longer find the strength to love him/her as before, despite all your good will. You failed so badly in business that you may no longer have the strength to do it again, even if new business ideas come to mind, etc.
When you lack spiritual, emotional strength, you obviously no longer have the boldness to do certain things. According to the Bible, the church of Ephesus was in a similar situation. « Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love », the Lord reproached that church in Revelation 2:4. In order for her to regain her first love, the Lord recommended this: « Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works (…) » (Revelation 2:5).
To regain the strength to pray for the sick, God searched my loins and reminded me of the source of my weakness in prayer, especially in this area. I confessed and repented. It was then that God restored my strength in prayer as well as the gift of miracle and healing in my ministry.
Beloved, remember what made you lose your first love for your spouse, for meditation on the Word, for undertaking again, for your zeal in the work of God, etc. Confess this with all your heart to the Father and repent. Don’t throw the first stone at the circumstances or people who hurt you. Acknowledge with all your heart that your human nature has taken over your divine nature; admit your weakness and ask the Father to restore your loins and give you back the strength you need. He is faithful, and He will do it! You will then find your first love, courage, strength and practice your first works… successfully!
May God bless you Beloved
« Examine me, O Lord, and [a]prove me; try my mind and my heart. »
« The refining pot is for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests the hearts. »
« I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, even to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his doings. »
« Who can understand his errors? Cleanse me from secret faults. »
« But your iniquities have separated you from your God; and your sins have hidden His face from you, so that He will not hear. »
« He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy. »
2 Corinthians 3:18
« But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord. »
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