How do you feel when you are disappointed, betrayed, frustrated, hurt by a loved one? Are you able to forgive with all your heart the evil done to you? We must acknowledge that this is not easy at all. Now the Bible is clear on this: “But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”. (Matthew 6:15).
Disappointments and frustrations are two feelings that occur when your hopes or expectations are betrayed: a break-up after an engagement, the unfaithfulness of your spouse that you so much love, the betrayal of a loved one, the failure to keep a promise made by a person you completely trusted, etc. These situations are sometimes difficult to forgive, all the more so because you were hurt! Disappointments and frustrations give birth to a root of bitterness in the heart that ultimately springs up and causes trouble, that deprives you of divine grace (Hebrews 12:15)! May this not be the case!
How then can we overcome frustrations and disappointments and forgive?First of all, we must imitate the Lord Jesus. “Now when He was in Jerusalem at the Passover, during the feast, many believed in His name when they saw the signs which He did. But Jesus did not commit Himself to them, because He knew all men, (…) He knew what was in man.”, says the Bible in John 2:23-25. Yes Beloved, the Master did not trust Man because He knew that human being was versatile and fallible. Many believed in Him in John 8:30 but sought to stone Him in John 8:59 because they did not accept His teaching. Didn’t Peter promise, even swear to Christ, that he would never deny him? He was sincere. And yet, in the face of adversity, he denied the Lord three times (Matthew 26:34-35 and 69-75)!
Do not rely on human beings, either. I do not encourage you to be suspicious of everyone or not to trust people, but bear in mind that the human race is fallible and versatile. Keep this in mind!
Then think about the number of times you too made a promise to someone that you were unable to keep, despite your good faith. Have you ever disappointed your neighbor who relied on you? And your Lord, whom you often disobey, does He not forgive your sins when you repent with a sincere heart? Remember how many times God had to forgive you for your mistakes!
Finally, to overcome frustrations and disappointments, pray for the person who hurt you. Do not rely on him/her but trust in God’s ability to make him/her a better person. When mistakes are repeated, correction is necessary. Correct but with love, as a parent corrects his child. But do not get tired of interceding with the Father so that He may help him/her overcome his/her weaknesses and transform him/her. Can you be disappointed because your baby gets its diaper dirty several times a day? No, simply because it is still at an age where it needs to be carried. Also carry with all your heart the burden of this person who hurt you. “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ”, says the Bible in Galatians 6:2.
By doing so, you will overcome life’s frustrations and disappointments. “Father, forgive them because they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34), said the Lord Jesus on the cross to plead God’s mercy for his executioners. You will also be able to forgive with all your heart so that you too may benefit not only from the Father’s forgiveness when you do wrong, but also from God’s grace.
May God bless you Beloved
« Looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled ».
« As He spoke these words, many believed in Him (…) Jesus said to them, “Most assuredly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I AM.” Then they took up stones to throw at Him; but Jesus hid Himself and went out of the temple, going ».
« The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked. Who can know it ».
Matthew 26:34-35, 74
« Jesus said to him, “Assuredly, I say to you that this night, before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.” Peter said to Him, “Even if I have to die with You, I will not deny You!” And so said all the disciples.(…) Then he began to curse and swear, saying, “I do not know the Man!” Immediately a rooster crowed ».
« Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And do not lead us into temptation ».
« But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses ».
« He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy ».
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